good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
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