Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
