Apparently you make a good broom.
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Randomize
