I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
