"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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