He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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