Me. At least after what I've been through.
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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