Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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