The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
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