"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
