you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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