I can't watch pbs sober anymore
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
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