He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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