dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
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