It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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