He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize