I understand Curling. That high.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
