East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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