I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize