home. puking in laundry basket.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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