every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
if i died would you start the facebook group?
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Randomize
