Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
