Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
i just google imaged poop.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
