So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
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