My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
