walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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