The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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