after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
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