That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
tell me about the eggs
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