i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
