I wanna bring you to show and tell
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Randomize
