doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
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