Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize