He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I understand Curling. That high.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
