she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
