I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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