i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
Girls should come with a carfax report
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize