That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize