he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
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