Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
i think my mom watched the whole time
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
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