I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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