I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
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