Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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