I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
