Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
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