No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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