hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
