Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
