Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
