She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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