we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
