Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Randomize
